I told myself months ago and even a year ago that I would be more consistent with blogging. But then I thought to myself, who and whom am I being consistent for when no one actually knows it exist. Despite the reality of it, I enjoy writing my thoughts down and instead of having an actual handwritten journal, I prefer the use of a digital journal. So much as changed since my last post. I laid the arts & crafts and YouTube vlogging to a rest. I've realized that you have to pick your battles and those were ones that were not for me. I didn't abandon the craft portion completely, I picked up sewing in the meantime. I have found it therapeutic as well, I'm not aiming to be a contestant on the next Project Runway but this is a craft, I should've learned as a kid. Due to the fact that my mom is an excellent seamstress. But like they say, you are never to young or too old to learn something new. Besides sewing, I started dating, got a job promotion and currently entering my last semester of grad school. So I can truly say this year is going out in style. But let's focus on the dating. So yes, I reconnected with someone from my past and starting off it was AMAZING but then reality sat in, the honeymoon phased out and life got real! I have never been in a "real" relationship and I don't know what TV shows, I have been watching or what but I didn't realize that you can FUCK UP as much as I have in such a short amount of time. No, I don't mean in a crazy way let's just put it like this, you can't treat everybody the same. Hell, I didn't know how much I could learn about myself in such a short time either. I have come to grip that I have gotten away with a lot of things, that no one ever pointed out and that may be due to the fact that they didn't care. Now what was overlooked before is not being overlooked now, I have had to take some moments and do some self-realizations, recite a few phrases in the mirror lol! I know I'm not saying much but put it like this the more I'm in this relationship, I am learning more about myself and having to face the reality that I am often times, my own worst enemy. I believe you can be single for way too long and when people come and go, we often replay the idea that "oh he wasn't the one" or "that's not the person God has for us" and in most cases, I believe that is true. However, I believe in a lot of cases it is our actions, reactions, insecurities and lack of self-confidence that's the reason people chose to get out when they can. My current relationship may last forever or end a month from now but what I will takeaway from it all is to 1. Some men like you exactly who you are DO NOT try to change yourself however it is ok to make some readjustments that will benefit you as a person and 2. Overthinking will leave your ass still SINGLE!!! Until next time....